“An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city”
We can all feel the weight of expectation. It can come from low self-worth or perfectionism. Being new to a situation or familiarity. Competency or inexperience.
But wherever it comes from, we need to work out how to handle it as it is the number one cause of disappointment – unmet expectations.
Here are a few tips that may help you navigate this minefield. But at its core, remember to remain kind. To yourself and to others.
Acts of grace allow expectations to be set aside and freedom to take its place.
What can we do to live outside of unrealistic expectations?
- Clarity – have honest, even robust conversations, to get clear understanding.
- Believe the best – all conversations struggle when we carry in agendas and assertions about the other person.
- Friendship – cultivate honest and vulnerable friendships with the ‘right’ people.
- Say ‘no’ to offence – decide I am not going to be offended. Allow a second to third thought on this tip. The phrase is, ‘to take offence’, but we can refuse it. Say ‘no’. It only leads to bitterness, unforgiveness, and ultimately debilitates our lives.
- Boundaries – set boundaries that are designed to let others in not keep everyone out and only set them after each of the above steps has been followed through.
- Personal responsibility – acknowledge and work on our own vulnerabilities around being exploited, let down or dismissed. We often find we can discover our own freedom!