The Parent Trap

We have called this month’s theme the parent trap. So, what is your trap? What is your vulnerability as a parent? You see, the parent trap is very real in each of us. It’s that inner brokenness which can sabotage us from acting in the best interest of our children and fulfilling our mission to raise a good man or woman.

And if you only have one weakness then you’re lucky. Very lucky. For parenting is as much a quest for self-realisation as understanding our child. And the risk in not facing our weaknesses across the parenting journey is that we pass them on. In fact, I have recently heard the phrase:

“What walks in the parent, runs in the child.”

And looking at my sons, I can see evidences of this truth. The good and the not so good.

So, here is one way I kept my fears in check and my vision in focus. I would tell myself, “Your responsibility is to raise a good man. Not a good boy. Not a happy man. But a good man.”

That became the filter for my judgement calls. It kept my eyes on the horizon, not the today. And kept my eyes on my sons not the opinion of others. And I like to think it served me and my boys well. They are indeed good men.

About Kelley

Kelley is a speaker, author, overseas aid worker and perpetual student. She is passionate about women and gender issues, both in the local and international context, which underpins her enthusiasm for kinwomen and its contribution to women ‘living their finest life’. In 2014 Kelley completed a Masters in International and Community Development before establishing The Foxglove Project. Foxglove is a registered charity focused on supporting international development projects that are sustainable and driven by indigenous leadership. Kelley’s paid work requires her to travel extensively to evaluate and support projects supported by Australian funds. This experience and networking enables Foxglove to partner with outstanding overseas agencies delivering real opportunities for the poor and vulnerable to lead independent self-determined lives. Kelley combines these passions with a love of family and faith. Across more than 30 years of marriage, Kelley and her husband have worked through many of the challenges of building a relationship while raising three sons. Their boys have now finished high school changing the dynamics of family life and relationships. One of her great joys is sharing parenting lessons and learning from good and bad (sometimes disastrous) experiences. She uses humour and common sense to talk about the everyday challenges facing parents in today’s context.